The Libertine Lounge:

A Little Convo Crack Up

2010-04-07T16:05:00.001-05:00

I just had a tiny conversation with Geoff.

Me: I like your shirt.

Him: I like your face.

It happened about 5 minutes ago and I'm STILL laughing about it. ;)

It's the little things that make you giggle that will keep you sane for a long time...

Last night's dinner

2010-04-07T15:55:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to test out the email/pic posting from my phone... This
was last night's delicious dinner. It's one of my favorite dishes from
Geoffy. Meatballs and rice. Mmm. Mmm. Mmmmm!

The Revival of My Blog

2010-04-07T15:22:00.002-05:00

Helloooooo! Pfft pfft pfft. Is this thing on? [taps on mic]

Wow, this place needs some Spring cleaning. There are way too many cobwebs around.

My girlfriend, Kelley, inspired me to keep up with my blog, so today, April 7, 2010, marks the day the revival begins. It's always nice to have a little outlet to post random thoughts, pics, and links. I can't believe my last post was on August 11, 2008. EPIC FAIL on my part.

Looking back at the blog I put together makes me laugh. I think I should update the background and colors to match me better. Although, the black, white, and red are still my favorite colors, but the huge smiley face on it is a bit much. Don't get me wrong, I still do love to laugh and smile, but it's a little horsey on my blog background, I think.

Since August 2008, a lot has changed. Just to name a few: I've since been with the man of my dreams, Geoff; I've gone back to school part-time; I've gone from full-time to part-time at Aspen Marketing and now work on a new account; I've purchased a new car; and have committed to training for and running the Soldier Field 10-Mile Race on May 30, 2010. With all of this going on, I'm going to try my hardest to blog whenever I can! This time, I won't let almost 2 years pass before my next entry.

I'll end this entry here, though. I'd like to go back to updating the actual look of the blog before I continue to enter any more. I'll also look into using blogger mobile so I can post thoughts as soon as they come to mind from my phone! Yay!

Bah bye for now! =)

Gettin' Fit: Day 1

2008-08-11T09:14:00.002-05:00

Hooray! I woke up early today, worked out, AND got to work on time! It's going to be a good week. Haha! =)

It must be those incredible Olympic athletes that have been giving me a little motivation to get my soft self off the couch and into the gym!

I wish I could swim as well as those freestyle swimmers! They have a great pool at the gym (XSport) and I'd love to take advantage of the entire length of it! I'd need a lifeguard present though. I'm not that strong of a swimmer. LOL!

Woohoo! Another hit!

2008-08-11T08:38:00.000-05:00

Here's today's horoscope for me:

Wearing your feelings on your sleeve for all to see can be exhausting, but it also can draw you closer to those you love. You'd rather be less emotional now, communicating about ideas and philosophies instead of your changing moods. But sometimes it's healthy to simply express what's in your heart, even if it has no meaning or value outside of the current context of sharing.

Aaaaah. That was nice. =)

Wow. 2 Days in a row!

2008-07-29T09:45:00.002-05:00

Here's my horoscope for today... Yet, another hit, rather than a miss! =)

Your expressed thoughts could take others for a ride, but just because an idea is far out doesn't always make it better. Instead of waxing philosophic or spinning tales of remote lands, try keeping your ideas closer to home. Talking about your feelings and your needs will encourage closeness between you and loved ones instead of increasing the distance.

Just thought I'd share...

2008-07-28T21:37:00.001-05:00

...my Facebook Status for today: "Libertine Venzuela thinks that there are just certain lines that you just should not cross. I don't care who you are. Be smart, considerate, & respectful. Thank You. =)."

That is all. Carry on...

Well, I should be the one to carry on. I was in the middle of writing my paper on An Inconvenient Truth. Ya know, that documentary with Al Gore talking about the moral imperative and Global Warming? Yes. That one.

It's for extra credit for my Bio class. And no, it's not because I'm an over-achiever, it's because I need to buy myself some insurance to secure a grade of an A for my transcripts! =)

My horoscope for today:

2008-07-28T15:16:00.001-05:00

It's usually hit or miss when it comes to horoscopes and such, but today, it's a hit:

Everything seems like a big deal today, making you feel like there is a lot at stake. Fortunately, you are able to overcome your fears about love and step into the current situation with a healthy attitude. Remember, though, someone else may not share your current enthusiasm, but don't take it too personally. The fewer expectations you have now, the better it will be for everyone involved.

Whoa.

Thanks to Wordle

2008-07-24T14:17:00.002-05:00

This image describes my latest accident:

This image is brought to you by Wordle

Thanks to the site and Billy, for discovering the site!

How many of me?

2008-07-16T10:12:00.004-05:00

HowManyOfMe.com

There are
1
or fewer people with my name in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

Thanks for finding this, Leenie! =)

4th of July Accident... REALLY?!?!

2008-07-04T22:19:00.016-05:00

Dave and I were "lucky" enough to start our holiday weekend with a lovely car accident on I-90, while heading up to Wisconsin.

This is my 3rd accident this year! WTF?! 1st one was on 2/12, 3rd one was on 4/4, and now this one happened today, exactly 3 months after my 2nd one.

Is there any way that my car can have the demons exorcised from it?

Jesus, take the wheel. (I borrowed that line from another blog I was introduced to. I'd credit the blog by including it's link here, but I don't know what it is right now... I'll have to find out on Monday.)

The only LUCKY part about the accident was that Dave and I came out alright. No cuts or bruises, just banged up from the jerking of our heads back and forth... and back and forth.

A Corolla in front of us locked up on their brakes because the 3 cars in front of him locked up on their brakes for no reason. They didn't end up hitting anyone in front of them, but for me and the pick-up truck behind me, it was too late.

With I-90 being under construction, in the area where the accident happened, there was no where to go, but forward. No shoulders were available to swerve into and the other lane wasn't clear to get into either.

I got a ticket for "Failure to Reduce Speed to Avoid An Accident," but was "given a break" since it was a holiday and didn't get my license taken away. The guy that rammed into me also got a ticket for the same reason. I got one since I hit the Corolla first, then the truck hit me. If the truck hit me first and then pushed me into the Corolla, then the truck driver would've been the only one to walk away with a ticket. He's even more fu¢ked because he was driving his work truck, while not being on work hours, which might be grounds for termination for him. I just hope that his company auto insurance isn't a pain in the ass to deal with. I'll leave all that up to my State Farm to deal with.

P.S.
We never made it to Wisconsin. We were only planning on spending the day and evening there since we had to get back to feed the dogs. Without the tail lights in tact, we didn't think it was a good idea to drive up to WI and drive it back at night. So we just went to the next gas station to find duct tape to tape the lights on, and headed back to Naperville. I'd say we had about 20-25 minutes left to drive to get to Milton, WI... only to turn back around.

Fun times. Un-freakin-believable.

Here are pics of the damage:

Wonderful trunk shot from my camera phone.

This is a better shot since it's from Dave's phone. Reminds me that I need a new phone.

Wonderful front shot from Dave's phone.

Front shot... At least my license plate is still in tact. Barely. It's on with one screw.

This is the Corolla that was in front of me. Damage was only on bumper of his car, so not bad at all.

Another trunk shot. The tail lights are only attached by the wires. We had to tuck them into the trunk, bunjee'd the trunk door to the bumper (yes, i actually had a bunjee cord in the trunk!!) to drive to the next gas station to find duck tape to tape them back into place.

This is the pick-up truck that rammed into my car. This is his damage. It doesn't look so bad from this picture, but he was leaking coolant immediately.

Another view of his front.

Tips for the ladies in year 2008

2008-06-06T15:19:00.003-05:00

I got this from Paula today in my e-mail inbox and thought it was worth copying and pasting into the ol' blog. =)

Enjoy!

Tips for the ladies in year 2008

1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy one in every color.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt... a wedge of lime, and shot of tequila

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot, it solves nothing; and make you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons in 2008 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember every good looking; sweet, single male is someone else's ex-boyfriend! Now smile and send to any girl wasting time at work, suffering from a hangover, or just suffering from work, that might need a reason to smile!

Dangerous

2008-06-03T10:42:00.002-05:00

Yesterday is the day I opened up an account with ebay. And the only reason why I did was because I found some college textbooks I need for my Biology class for a fraction of the list prices on Half.com (powered by ebay). My books would've cost me $310 with shipping. After finding my NEW books on half.com, I only paid $147 with shipping! Woohoo! Go me! =)

What makes this dangerous is that I found a bunch of stuff on the site that I would be interesting in buying, but MUST refrain from doing so! Cash is tight. Must. Stay. Strong. LOL!

05.25.08 Matty's Memorial Day BBQ Pics

2008-05-30T10:12:00.002-05:00

Here are the pics from Matty's Memorial Day BBQ (in video form). It paints a pretty good picture of how it all went. =)

This also marked the day that I did my first keg stand. Who knew that I could do it in my 30's? LOL!

Wilda & Edison's Wedding Pics

2008-05-28T15:17:00.002-05:00

The pics are all out of order and I'll get around to organizing them better, but I just wanted to get them posted!

Hooray! =)

Hungry. . .

2008-05-22T13:42:00.002-05:00

I'm excited for tonight! Dave and I are going to his school graduation dinner thingy tonight at Finley's Grill Room in Downers Grove, IL.

I know. I'm such a nerd.

This has been established a long time ago. Long enough for me to accept it. LOL! =)

Woohoo. Part 2! =)

2008-05-16T16:52:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I got my new dental appliances for phase 1 of the work that needs to be done to fix my TMJD. My daytime appliance is in and I'm still getting used to it being in my mouth.

I should rephrase:

My daytime applianthe ith in and I'm thill getting uthed to it being in my mouth. LOL!

Tho far, tho good! No pain shooting up to my temples! Hooray!

Woohoo!

2008-05-14T15:47:00.003-05:00

It's a good day today.

1) I get my car back after work today!

2) I was just approved for a loan for $5,000 from Zopa!

Dental work, school, and buying out the ex-fiance out of the house are just THAT much closer to becoming a reality!

I heart today. =)

Preventing Dementia.

2008-05-13T15:19:00.002-05:00

Today at work:
In between projects, I've been preventing dementia/alzheimer's by stimulating my mind with Facebook applications such as Word Twist, Text Twirl, Scramble, and Pathwords.

Life is good. =)

Wachoo fink?

2008-05-13T15:18:00.001-05:00

I truly can't wait to get my Damon 3 braces in 3 months!! :D

The demons inside of me...

2008-05-06T09:49:00.003-05:00

I've been in a foul mood lately and I can't quite put a finger on why. Well, I should rephrase that. I can't just point to just one thing in particular that's been eating away at my insides. It's a number of things.

I've had such a strong itch to go back to school and my attitude toward work is beginning to fall toward the "I-just-don't-give-a-shit-anymore-cuz-I-wanna-get-the-F-outta-here-already" mentality. And I know that's the wrong way to go about things, but that's just how it is.

I have a low tolerance for fake people and a low tolerance for arrogance and stupidity. That will be around for a long time, I believe.

Last Friday (May 2nd) was Wilda's (my best friend/sister) wedding. There were people there from my past. Some I enjoyed seeing and there were a select few that I could've done without. It saddened me a bit to see my former best friend, Jay, there. We haven't spoken to each other in ages. It was after I broke off my engagement to Laurence. I'm not sure if that played a part in our end in friendship, but I'm sure it had a little to do with it. What saddens me the most is that there was never any real reason established for him to stop talking to me and it prevents me from feeling any sense of closure. I'm learning to let it go, and I'm not losing sleep over it, but for a best friendship of over 10 years, to just end in a blink, it's dizzying.

I still don't have my car back. It's been a month and 2 days since my 2nd accident. Grr. I'm sick of the PT Cruiser (aka PT Loser).

I just got a real estate tax bill in the mail. For a whopping $5,110.64. This need for money is killing more and more everyday. So, not only do I have to pay for half of that by 6/2 and 9/2, but I need $1500 for school by 6/9, and $2700 for dental work by 5/15. Grrrr!

Sometimes, I don't enjoy being a grown-up.

Thanks for the vent. I know I was all over the place, but I've been busy with work, so I was blogging in between projects. LOL!

Need a good laugh?

2008-05-05T11:25:00.002-05:00

Here's a recent picture of my goddaughter, Emma. If this picture doesn't make you laugh, you might want to check your pulse. Seriously. Who WOULDN'T laugh? We'd be laughing WITH her, of course. Not AT her. =)

R.I.P. Bandit

2008-04-15T12:02:00.002-05:00

Last night, Bandit, passed away from a large tumor in his stomach that ruptured.

We'll miss you Bandit.

OMG.

Soo sad. I can't control the tears. Need to get outside for a walk.

I'm soo sorry, Wilda & Edison. =(

PT Cruiser Update.

2008-04-14T21:02:00.003-05:00

The PT Cruiser rental is still cute, but that's all it has going for it.

Other than the cute interior and somewhat cute exterior, the PT Loser (as Leenie had coined it) is a piece o' crap. The little 4-cylinder toy car struggles to reach 40mph and makes you aware of every single gear it hits. It might even give passengers a nasty bout of car sickness. Ok, maybe that's a bit dramatic, but I guess I've been spoiled with the luxury of CVT (continuously variable transmission) in my '07 Maxie.

I can't wait to be reunited with my Maxie and rid of the put-put toy car!

I should follow up with Glendale Nissan tomorrow morning.

Until then... g'night... for serious this time. Muscle relaxer, brush teeth, get neked, then bed. In that order. ;)

Live Long & Prosper...

2008-04-14T20:20:00.008-05:00

It's been a while since I've blogged. I stink. I know this. I'm still an amateur blogger. I'm sure if I kept up with this daily, I'd become an incredible blogtress this side of Naperville has ever seen! LOL!

Today, I signed up with Prosper.com. It has been a tip that my buddy, Joe Giordano, had been telling me about and it wasn't until today that I did something about it.

Here's the story:
I need about $8K - $10K in my pocket to get an extensive amount of dental work done to me in order to fix my TMJ. The reason why I need the money in my pocket is because the dentist's office requires the money up front, then I make a claim(s) toward my dental insurance to get reimbursed a certain percentage per procedure. I need a splint built (Phase 1 of treatment) and special braces called Damon 3 (Phase 2 of treatment).

I'm super excited to get all this work done, so 1) I won't be suffering anymore jaw pain from eating or even yawning and 2) I will be getting my overjet and overbite fixed as well (FINALLY!)

Ok, so here's where Prosper.com came into play. I was talking to Joe about how amazing it was that even with my measely 4% raise that I got in early March, I still find it difficult to make ends meet. Shocker. I know. So Joe told me that Prosper.com might be a good solution.

Here's what it says on Prosper.com's home page:

Prosper is an online community for lending and borrowing money.
Bidding on borrowers' loans, lenders get great returns by offering great rates.
And that means everybody does better. Together.

Here's how it works:

Borrowers create a listing and set the interest rate they're willing to pay
Lenders place bids with as little as $50 toward the loan
Prosper combines the bids with the lowest rates into one simple loan
The loan amount is deposited directly into your bank account.

There's also a short video that demonstrates how it all works and how everyone benefits.

I thought this might be a good option for me to turn to since I was denied a dental loan of $10k from Capital One Healthcare Finance, a 3rd party financial institution that my dentist's office deals with. Fun times.

Grr. I'm going to cut it short here. My jaw is killing me and I'm going to go take a muscle relaxer and pass out for the night... Maybe crunchy cereal wasn't a wise choice for dinner tonight. Oh well.

Smooches and Embraces. G'night! :-*

The rental car...

2008-04-08T14:10:00.004-05:00

Dave drove me to the Enterprise by us to pick up an "economy" car this morning... and this is what I'm currently driving:

2008 PT Cruiser

It's too cute! The interior was built with my favorite colors (black, white, grey, and red). So whenever I drive it, I have this fantastic feeling that it was custom-built for ME... or at least with ME in mind! 'Cuz we know that this small world revolves around me! ROFLMAO! :D

Here's a pic of the interior, except, where you see blue, it's really red, to match the exterior. =)

String of bad car luck...

2008-04-06T16:41:00.018-05:00

Once again, I got into a car accident on Friday morning while on my way to work... I was going north on 59, about to cross over I-88, and a 71-yr-old man, in a huge pick up truck, decides to turn left in front of me to get on to the I-88 on-ramp. I slam on my brakes, i lay my arm on the horn, swerve to try and avoid him, but he decided to keep going. He hit my driver's side front corner and side and pushed me into the metal guard rail.

Here's what he did to my poor Maxie. (pics below.)

I'm beginning to take this string of bad luck personally. How could one possibly have 2 car accidents within 7 weeks of each other?!? Both of them weren't my fault, but still. C'mon now! Quit testing my patience, ya know?

The guy was issued a ticket for failing to yield to oncoming traffic. I clearly had a green light and a witness actually stayed, to not only call 911 for me, but to talk to the police officer to tell him what had happened. He also left his card with me, just in case I would need him for any court hearings.

The old man was from Michigan and would need to appear in court. The police officer left it up to me as to whether or not I wanted to appear as a witness. If I appeared as a witness, his ticket would stick and he would have to go through traffic school. If I didn't appear, the police officer would be okay with it, but the guy would only have to pay the fine of the ticket and not go to traffic school. So, I'm not really sure what I'm going to do with all that when it comes time to decide.

When i was being questioned by the police officer, I guess I wasn't really looking at the police officer when I was talking, so he asked if he should call the paramedics since I looked like I was in a daze... that kind of scared me 'cuz I thought I was looking right at him the entire time. I guess my eyes were wandering all over the place which was enough cause for alarm for him to get the paramedics over.

They had a bit of trouble trying to get me out of the driver's side since my door was a little hard to open, but eventually they got me in a collar and strapped onto a stiff board. I was driven to Edward Hospital in Naperville. The paramedics ride there was quite entertaining. I was being taken care of by the most hilarious pair of Naperville Fire Fighters.

When I got to the ER, I had a bunch of x-rays done and everything turned out fine. PHEW! I just had some neck pain at the base of the skull and at the base of my neck, but that was about it. I was given an Rx for Flexeril, a muscle relaxer, which is now my new best friend! =) I've had the best night's sleep since the accident 'cuz of the meds and the tissue damage doesn't feel as bad as the last accident! =)

So, once again, I'm with out a car, since my car was left undriveable. Not because of engine damage, but because I would damage my tires w/in the dented wheel well, if I tried to make turns. And plus, with my driver's side mirror hanging off and shattered, it's just asking for a ticket for not having a driver's side mirror on.

My car is now in a towing company's lot in Naperville, until the other guy's insurance company comes to assess the damages. I should be hearing from them (AAA) by Monday or Tuesday. Hopefully, his insurance coverage includes car rental, so I can at least rent a car out of all this.

I was able to enjoy the rest of the weekend and get outside though. Yesterday, Dave and I got outside to run a bunch of errands, made tacos for dinner, and today, we actually just got back from taking the dogs outside for a very long walk, then I went for a run outside as well. =)

Friday, wasn't really my idea of a fun day off. I could've thought of other fun things to do rather than wreck my car!

Metal guard rail marks...

Another pic of the metal guard rail marks.

Driver's side crumples.

Another view of driver's side crumples.

Poor mirror hanging by its wires.

View of how far the swipe went down the side.

Crumpled hinge. It made a nasty teeth-shattering sound when the paramedics attempted to open the door.

More swipe shots.

Where my driver's side mirror USED to be. Now it's shattered and spread along the Rte 59 and I-88 intersection.

Another shot of the driver's side mirror. The shattered mirror left a powdery residue on the window.

Without a patch: Day 3

2008-04-01T10:57:00.002-05:00

I'm on the 3rd day of not wearing a patch, and I admit, this 3rd day is brutal. Sunday and yesterday were alright, but today, I feel like wringing everyone's necks. I don't feel like working today. After the week I had here at work last week, I think I deserve to enjoy a little down time. Is that so wrong? LOL! I should probably look into putting the patch back on tomorrow. This is getting ridiculous. I shouldn't have this nasty attitude.

Too bad this isn't an April Fool's joke. I'm a bear today. So bear with me. :P

Can't wait to see what kind of practical jokes surface around here at work today. I could use some entertainment!

see more crazy cat pics

Struggling...

2008-03-27T10:54:00.002-05:00

This past Tuesday (3/25), I was at work from 8:15am and worked until 3am Wed morning. Got home at 3:30 and couldn't fall asleep until well past 4:30. I tossed and turned. I just couldn't get my mind to stop racing! I was beyond exhaustion that I just couldn't get myself to fall asleep! So when I woke up at 10am on Wed morning, I still felt unrested and to make things worse, I had a headache the size of Asia.

Today, I'm feeling the worst of it. The lack of sleep and the weird sleeping patterns and lack of routine have left me feeling drunk with exhaustion. My brain is functioning on dial-up mode and can't seem to upgrade to DSL. Sheesh. I've been working on tele-com direct mail for too long. LOL!

Can't wait to catch up on sleep this Sunday! It'll be a busy weekend, so the only day I can catch up to normalcy is on Sunday... Ugh.

Aww man. I have to cut this short here. Have work to do now. Uck. More soon.

Smooches and Embraces.

First Full Day of Spring...

2008-03-21T11:17:00.001-05:00

...and it's snowing. Fantastic.

Why Stick People Became Extinct...

2008-03-20T15:22:00.001-05:00

I know this one's old, but I thought it was worth posting on here. It STILL cracks me up to this day! =) Hope it does the same for you. :P

Feel-Good Texts

2008-03-20T08:57:00.004-05:00

I just wanted to share some text messages that were exchanged after work yesterday. They cracked me (and her) up soo badly, I just HAD to share!

Me: I think the Mexican mute with the personality of a pencil is in a gold Maxima. The one u were behind at the 64-59 light! LOL!

Her*: Ha! LMAO! She drives like an effin immigrant!

Me: ROFLMAO!

We're STILL giggling about it this morning. =)

I'm giggling about it as I'm typing this out! It's gonna be a good day today.

*Identity omitted for the privacy of the text messager. "Messager" is that even a word?

St. Patty's Day 2008

2008-03-18T17:04:00.001-05:00

Being Irish for a day (and night) is exhausting!

2008-03-18T11:44:00.003-05:00

As most of you know, yesterday was St. Patrick's Day. And most of you also know that EVERYONE is Irish on March 17th. I definitely was! The beers started flowing at 3:45pm... at a place that I'd rather not mention on here. Let's just say, it was not in a bar setting. =) Treats were brought in by a certain someone. When I say "treats," I mean treats that rhyme with Bamstel Bites. They were super cold and super yummy!

The beers continued to flow at McNally's in St. Charles. Several of us from Aspen went there to see the band Mike & Joe. They didn't start until almost 8pm. They were supposed to start at 7pm, but "Joe" from Mike & Joe got stuck in traffic. I have not seen this band since 1998! Just nuts that they're still around! I found out last night that this is their full-time gig! They must be doing well! :D

Pictures were taken and dancing was done... so much so, that my legs are a bit sore today! LOL! Sad! I'll post the pictures as soon as I get them from Colleen.

Those who part of the Irish line-up last night were:
Me, Dave, Colleen, Chris, Deanna, her boyfriend Sean, and their friends Heidi and Mark, Mike Searle, new guy Geoff, Nick, Tim, Joe Sagan, Bob Nowacki, Kim, her friend Leanne, Erin Bell, Julie Leuck, her friend Larry, and Tom Knight, Jenna, Carson, and I ran into Sara Rejnert there with her friends.

Good times... pictures coming soon!

I haz da power to make my own capshuns! This cud get ugly.

2008-03-12T15:45:00.001-05:00

moar funny pictures

I IS CUTER RIGHT? LOL!

2008-03-10T11:09:00.001-05:00

Morning Classes, A Turtle, and Pregnant?

2008-03-06T11:45:00.003-06:00

This week I've been having the strangest dreams.

Last night, I had a dream that I was going to school with Dave and we were taking a class together. It was some sort of Indian-Asian class that had two Indian instructors with strong accents. We were watching a movie in class and Dave was snuggling up with some blonde bimbo on the couch. She kept rubbing herself closer to him and he kept trying to shove her off and was saying things like, "Wow. It must be nice to be kicking back with your feet up on a desk there." He was referring to the blonde bimbo that was sitting next to him on the couch. She had a desk in front of her to prop her feet on.

Then I went to hang up my coat on the coat hooks in the front of the classroom and when I went back to my desk, it had toppled over. I guess my purse and backpack that were hanging on the back of the chair were too heavy for it to handle.

Then there was all this commotion outside in the hallway outside the classroom door. One of the students had come inside, had a turtle in his hand, turned his back toward the class, and tossed the turtle behind him like a bride would when she would toss the bouquet. Of course, it comes flying in my direction and I stepped back so it wouldn't hit me. It landed shell-side down in front of me and was flailing its little arms and legs around struggling to get up. So I flipped it over and jumped back so it wouldn't bite me.

Then it jumped to a scene where Dave and I had another class at 11am, but it wasn't the same class, so when we kissed each other bye, we just couldn't stop and I had to consider taking my classes at night so that we wouldn't keep doing that! We ended up being late for our classes.

The end.

There were some other weird dreams this past week, but now I can't remember them! Dangit! Oh wait... There was another dream I had where I was pregnant, but I still continued to take my birth control pills and it didn't affect the pregnancy in any way. I don't think I ever started "showing" at all. It was a short dream, but I remember breathing really heavily and really rapidly in real life sleep. So weird.

Makes me want to look up the interpretations of these dreams online or something.

We'll see what I dream of tonight...

My adorable goddaughter, Emma!

2008-03-05T15:35:00.002-06:00

I just wanted to be a bragging Godmother and show off some gorgeous pics of my Goddaughter, Emma. I'm missin' her like crazy! She moved to Santa Barbara, CA with her mom and dad. =(

More car fun!

2008-03-05T14:57:00.010-06:00

At lunch today, I took my car back into Glendale Nissan. The temperature gauge that reads the outside temperature is stuck at -22° F. Grrr & Brrrr!!

Since my car is thinking that it's crazy cold outside, the heater is acting as if it really is nipple-riffically cold. Glendale Nissan thought it was just going to be a simple computer fix, but turns out that they need to send it back to the Woodfield Nissan body shop to take it apart and fix all the sensors, etc.

THIS time around, I have a loaner car to drive around while my car is being serviced. It's a hot little number. It's an '08 Altima in this sexy Dark Slate color. =) She's still not as sexy as my Maxie, but it'll do. =)

My sexy Maxie is now back to looking like this:

Rather than this:

So I'll take whatever I can get, right? =)

K, gonna get back to work now. Thanks for the nice little break.

More soon... Smooches,
Liblet

Sore leg. Really?

2008-03-03T13:24:00.000-06:00

So, I got my car back on Friday evening and drove it home that night... On Saturday, Dave and I ran a bunch of errands all around Naperville-Aurora and by the time we were done with our 3rd stop, I was tired of driving. I was more irritated with all the typical weekend traffic around that area, but I was physically tired too. So Dave drove the rest of the errands throughout the day.

Yesterday, March 2nd, my mom turned 70. So I surprised her with a a dinner at Pete Millers in Schaumburg. She thought it was just going to be the 3 of us for dinner, but I ended up inviting my extended family to join us. It was a pleasant surprise for her. When she saw them, the first thing she said was, "I was wondering why no one was calling me today!" LOL! She had a great time at dinner and chatting it up with Dave next to her. That was the most Dave has ever heard out of her mouth since he's met her! Haha!

I drove to Glendale Heights to pick up my mom before dinner, drove to Schaumburg, then drove back to Glendale Heights to drop my mom off, then back to Naperville.

This morning... I woke up with a sore right leg... Just the right leg! LMAO! It was a whopping 18 days of not driving for me, and I'm just going to assume that my "driving muscles" were woken up over the weekend...? Is that really what's going on here? It makes me chuckle a bit. I'm not sore from working out or anything like that... sheesh. I haven't been to the gym in a LONG time. Shame on me... Sometime this month, I'll fit it into my days. I MUST. I'm gettin' a bit soft. LOL!

K, just thought I'd share my fun little story. Hope you found it as amusing as I did. Sore right leg. HA! Such a doofus! :P

Twittering Away!

2008-02-29T11:19:00.001-06:00

Yesterday, I created an account in Twitter. You can find me in there as "libletlounge."

It's just another fun way to see what peeps are up to and see how creative people can get by answering the one question of: What Are You Doing?

Just thought I'd let y'all know about the latest thing I've been playing around with. =)

More soon...

Smooches,
Liblet

P.S.
Happy Leap Year Day! :D AND Happy Friday!

What the "About Me" section didn't allow me to enter...

2008-02-27T11:48:00.001-06:00

So I tried to copy and paste my "About Me" from my MySpace profile into the "About Me" section on this blog, but it only allows 1200 characters. Really? Who can sum themselves up in 1200 characters? Me? not-so-much.

So here it is, in my blog, a bit lengthy yes, but I just couldn't get myself to cut anything out!

I'm 100% filipino.
I'm a whopping 5'0" tall...hehe!
I'm fun and easy to get along with.
I'm usually down for just about anything you put in front of me. From trying new restaurants to snuggling to trying new clubs/lounges/martini bars.
I enjoy good laughs and good food with family and friends.
I'm a graphic designer.
The nerd in me loves to do crossword puzzles. It stimulates the mind. ;)
I enjoy running races from 5k's to marathons.
I hope to run more marathons throughout my lifetime. :)
I enjoy power naps, although, the "power" part of it usually drops off and it ends up being a multiple-hours-of-nap. Something that I'd rather not get into the habit of!
My favorite dessert is cookies, especially the homemade ones! Mmmm! :P
I enjoy celebrating birthdays! :)
It's a treat to have a grande soy chai every now and then.
I enjoy watching movies of all kinds. Touching movies make me cry.
I still enjoy listening to slow jams when the mood strikes me.
I've been told I have an infectious/contagious laugh. LAUGH, not disease. LAUGH. Just so we're clear. ;)
I crave good glasses (or bottles!) of wine. Preferably reds. But if the mood strikes, I enjoy a sweet white (i.e., reisling) in the summer months.
I love garlic! There is no such thing as too much garlic!
Hmm what other things can I share about the Liblet...
I heart spooning.
I don't heart drama.
I love to laugh and make people laugh.
I'm a hopeless romantic.
I never used to get along with my mom back in the day because we're both so head strong and soo much alike, but now she's like my best friend and I'm fortunate enough to have this relationship with her. She cracks me up beyond belief.
I try to tell my family and friends that I love them, whenever I get the chance, because who knows what tomorrow will bring and you never know if it'll be the last time you'll be able to say it.
I love game shows like Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy and 1 vs. 100. haha!,
I've earned a yellow and orange belt in Tae Kwon Do back in 2002, while training for the Chicago Marathon.
I have neat handwriting and have been told that it should be made into a font.
I used to be able to draw, but I've lost it.
My body is a temple and I must take care of it! I want to get my six pack back.
Now that I'm a member to XSport Fitness, I'm just THAT much closer to making it happen! =)
I enjoy giving people nicknames and guessing middle names.
I am truly blessed to have wonderful family and friends.

The birth of my blog...

2008-02-27T10:41:00.000-06:00

Today is Wednesday, February 27th, 2008. It is now the day that my blog was born and introduced into this world. As far as what I'm going to post on here, I haven't thought that through yet, but I just wanted to get it up and running, so I chose today to make it happen. Plus, I have a little down time here at work, so it all works out.

I may copy and paste some of my past blogs entered into my MySpace profile to get this thing started. I'll probably visit from time to time (eh, who am I kidding? I'll probably be on here daily) to drop in my random thoughts. So, feel free to stop by anytime!

I know myself pretty well to know that the thoughts may range from happy thoughts to venting thoughts to mushy gushy thoughts... So bear with me here. This is why I chose to name my blog page "The Libertine Lounge: Get Lost In Thoughts Here."

I hope you enjoy reading into the mind of Liblet...

Thanks for listening. =)

A Life of Maybes

2008-01-10T18:11:00.000-06:00

I saw this posted in a bulletin, but I thought it was definitely worth it to copy and paste it into a blog... Enjoy! =)

Maybe we were supposed to meet the wrong people before meeting the right one so that, when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift.

Maybe when the door of happiness closes, another opens; but, often times, we look so long at the closed door that we don't even see the new one which has been opened for us.

Maybe it is true that we don't know what we have until we lose it, but it is also true that we don't know what we have been missing until it arrives.

Maybe the happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

Maybe the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; after all, you can't go on successfully in life until you let go of your past mistakes, failures, and heartaches.

Maybe you should dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go, be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you dream of, and want to do.

Maybe there are moments in life when you miss someone - a parent, a spouse, a friend, a child, your girlfriend/boyfriend -- -- so much that you just want to pick them from your dreams and hug them for real, so that once they are around you appreciate them more.

Maybe the best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch and swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.

Maybe you should always try to put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that something could hurt you, it probably will hurt the other person, too.

Maybe you should do something nice for someone every single day, even if it is simply to leave them alone.

Maybe giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don't expect love in return; just wait for it to grow in their heart; but if it doesn't, be content that it grew in yours.

Maybe happiness waits for all those who cry, all those who hurt, all those who have searched, and all those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of all the people who have touched their lives.

Maybe you shouldn't go for looks; they can deceive; don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. Find the one who makes your heart smile.

Maybe you should hope for enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make you happy.

Maybe . . you should try to live your life to the fullest because when you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling, but when you die, you can be the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Maybe you could repost this message for those people who mean something to you, to those who have touched your life, to those who can and do make you smile when you really need it, to those who make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down, and to all those whom you want to know that you appreciate them and their friendship

I need to vent...

2008-01-10T11:41:00.000-06:00

Ok, something has been eating away at me since yesterday morning...

I just don't appreciate it when I'm given a look that says closed-minded and judgemental ALL over it. How my relationship is going and what steps we have made thus far should NOT trigger those facial expressions.

Yes, I suppose to people from the outside, we're moving "fast," but I guess the only way I can explain it is this way: When you know, you just know. He's the one that was meant to be with me and I'm the one who is meant to be with him. I guess people who have been in the "when you know, you just know" situation understand where I'm at more clearly than those that haven't found "the one" yet. So, with that said, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. Which is what I've been doing since October, but each time any little fun story comes up about us, I get a weird face and a weird tone of voice that goes with it. It just dampens my excitement.

I can't expect everyone to be excited for me or with me, but being that there's only ONE person that gives me these facial expressions and condescending tones, it makes me feel bad for that person. One should be as open-minded as humanly possible. Everyone's entitled to their opinions, I get that. It's just that some consideration should be made about how one would make the other person feel.

I guess I'm feeling this way because I'm the friend that would love to share another's excitement without any form of condescending tones or possibly jealousy. And I kind of expect the same sort of friendship in return. It's sad because, now I'm just compelled to not say anything about the relationship at all. It is, frankly, our business and no one else's, but when it comes to exciting, big news, i can't help but share a few stories here and there. To avoid drama and to avoid unnecessary confrontations, I'll just choose who I talk to carefully. It's kind of sad that it has to be that way, but I just don't want to get that feeling of someone raining on my parade ever again. So that can just simply be accomplished by keeping my mouth shut. I've kept my mouth shut about the intimate details, because those should remain private and always will be. But to not be able to share little stories here and there without getting the raised eyebrows and the doubtful tones of voice? That just simply sucks. Oh well.

The two people that are in the relationship are the ONLY ones that REALLY know how right or wrong everything is and should not be judged by anyone from the outside.

That's all I have for now. I just needed to take the time to vent on here.

Thanks for listening (reading)!

I feel better now that's all off my chest! Yippeeeee! :D

XoXo,
Liblet

P.S.
If anything else pops in my head regarding this, I'll blog it again later. Until then, have a fabulous day! =)

Random thoughts...

2007-12-11T15:31:00.000-06:00

Things have been slowing down at work, so I thought I'd take the time to blog, since I haven't blogged in a while.

Hmm. Blog, blogged, blogging. Such a funny word. Let's move on...

This year's Christmas with the family will be in Milton, Wisconsin at my cousin's house. Usually we draw names for secret santas over the Thanksgiving holiday, but since this year's turnout was a bit smaller than usual, we didn't end up drawing names... So, I came up with this "solution" for us. I figured the peeps that are in my generation would bring booze to the party... The older folks can choose to exchange gifts if they want to, and everyone will just buy gifts for the kidlets! =) So far, it sounds like a grand idea to my mom and cousin (and hopefully everyone else! LOL!) since we're all broke this year... We can all just enjoy each other's company w/o the stress of gift-shopping, or selling our eggs or plasma, turning to prostitution or shoplifting. LOL!

On other notes, life is good. I found a man (ahem ahem, Dave) who loves me and takes such incredible care of me... especially during my rough times. I really don't know what I would do without him. He's my sunshine, my rock, my comedian, my bear, my best friend, my love.

I've waited a long, long time for him. I guess I had to go through the relation-shits first to build a stronger foundation of the better person I am today...learn the life lessons of what to do and what not to do. He has definitely been worth the wait! That's fo' daym sho'!

My living situation is still a cluster F. I still own property with the ex-fiancé, but haven't stayed there in over 2 months. I've been staying at Dave's place and so far, it's been fantastic! :D Oh! Which reminds me that I need to go home and get more clothes at some point tonight... if the weather will allow me to!

Ok, back to the Aurora property... This past Saturday, I just got news from my realtor that wasn't really a shocker, but it was still bad news nonetheless. He basically told us that the comparable properties around us are listed for much less than what we had paid for it, renting it out would be very unlikely since the rental prices for those places are running at no more than $1600 and our mortgage is WELL above that... another option is a short sale, which, I don't want to resort to. So, that brings me to this thought: I'm going to try to pay some debt off, and see if I can get approval to buy the ex-fiancé out, have Dave move in and rent, and have Jillian move in and rent... Although, with Jilly, it might be a hard sell. She works in Bartlett and it would be pointless for her to further her commute while paying rent... Or I can look for a 3rd person to rent, if it came down to that. Basically, what needs to happen is that the mortgage needs to be split between 3 peeps. (I would take the bulk of it) and the 2 paying rent would be about the same. This can go on for a while until the market picks up and I can actually get the place listed and either break even or get a little something back.

It just breaks my heart that my savings of $11K that was put into the place (and them some) would be completely gone if I had to short sale or list the house at almost nothing... There has to be other options out there, but the 3 ppl situation thing is the only thing that's coming to mind... Anyone else have any other suggestions? Anyone want to live with me & Dave in Aurora? LOL!

If I step back and think about it all, it's really not all that bad. Yeah, it's frustrating on a day to day basis, especially during the days that my mortgage check is in the mail and will be posted... and wondering if my checking account is in the negatives, but in the grand scheme of things, if I didn't decide to leave my engagement behind, I wouldn't have met the man of my dreams. I know, I know. Mushy gushy! But it's true! =)

Hmm. What else do I have for ya... This past weekend was fun fun fun! Minus the hour of bad news with my realtor...

Let's see. Last Friday (12/7) was the Midwestern University Winter Formal at the Carlisle in Lombard. It was a blast! Ate yummy food, had some good laughs at the dinner table and on the dance floor, danced to romantical-like songs while looking into each others eyes all googley-eyed, sweat 'til we couldn't sweat no mo'! Did I mention I went with Dave? It was his school's dance. LOL! Oh, another thing to add on the list of "Things To Do" is to upload those pictures! Ha! Sheesh, by reading this, one would think I have A.D.D.

So, last Saturday, I finally met Dave's BFF, Paula (aka dirty pirate hooker), and immediately we hearted each other. Hooray! :D It's refreshing to know that there are others out there that can be as raw and uncensored and unfiltered as much as humanly possible! AND best of all, I got her to snort a couple times and she forced the nerd laugh outta me! If I could spell out the sound of my nerd laugh, I would, but I'd rather not try it. HAHA! Oh, and I grabbed her left tit at some point in the night, but it wasn't remarkable enough for her to remember THAT part! LOL!

Sunday, Dave and I went to the Egg Factory up north and had the most incredible breakfast i've EVER had. Ugh. I'm salivating as I'm typing... Then we head over to his dad's place up in Wheeling and helped his dad out with things around the house since his dad's left leg is being held together with pins and screws. Well, there was VERY little for me to help out with, other than hand Dave the tape measure and occasional chunks of insulation, so I sat on the couch, chatted it up with his dad while enjoying Gomez in the background, flipped through a Ducati book, watched a couple movies, tried to complete a crossword puzzle with Dave while watching a movie, had a few smokes with Dave and his dad... Then, the grand finale was Mr. Schmitz cooked us a yummy dinner of swiss steaks, mashed taters, and buttered italian bread. Mmm Mmm Mmm! :P His dad cracks me UP! I see Dave picked up a lot of great things from him. His humor, the way he tells stories, the way he hums and sings around the house... it tugs at the heart strings, really. LOL

K, i think that's all I have at the moment... Until next time... Smooches! :-*

I find it hilarious...

2007-11-12T17:00:00.000-06:00

As I'm sitting here, catching up on my missed Grey's Anatomy episodes, I'm thinking about how hilarious it is that someone actually thinks that I will walk away with nothing.

I spent YEARS busting my ass working (a few jobs at a time) and enduring living at home with my mom for a few years after college to save up for a house. I scrounged up $5K as an initial down payment, then took out an earnest money loan for $7,125 to cover the rest of the down payment, paid $6,125 of that loan (the 1K of that, came from the other party) and yet, all of a sudden, I'm not "entitled" to that money because ~I'M~ the reason this is happening in the first place??

First of all, me trying to get rid of the property in Aurora with the ex-fiance, is a BUSINESS transaction and should NOT include any PERSONAL/EMOTIONAL matters in those transactions. So me wanting to leave the engagement and the house, have absolutely NOTHING to do with what I'm entitled to or not entitled to.

Here's a nice little wake-up call (or maybe we can call it a rude awakening) for those who think that I'm not entitled to MY share of money... Okay, make sure you're sitting down for this...

No matter what sort of transactions take place, whether I get bought out of the property, or if we put the place on the market, I WILL be getting MY share of money, whether it's the full amount of what escaped from my own wallet, give or take a few hundred or a few thousand, it doesn't matter. I'm walking away with something PERIOD. There is no LEGAL WAY that I will walk away with zero, just because of a personal opinion that I don't "deserve" to walk away with anything. It's a completely ridiculous thought. And to compare it to an "early withdrawl penalty" just makes me laugh even harder.

Now, i realize that everyone's entitled to their opinions, but when it comes to opinions that have no substance or foundation, and are just based from maliciousness, revenge, or even based from opinions of their friends, it almost negates the entitlement.

If research was done BEFORE his mouth even opened to puke out such garbage, I wouldn't be venting via this blog right now...

Here are the facts in BOLD:
Both names are on the property therefore, each party are entitled to 50% of the property. You can ask any attorney, mortgage lender, or average Joe or average Jane, and it would be the same answer each time. The 2 people that are on the loan each get 50%.

If anything, I'm STILL getting screwed by him getting 50% when I put in over 10K and he put in 4K. So in a sense, him saying "We wouldn't be here in this situation, if it wasn't for you." is TRUE... We wouldn't even be in the house if I didn't have that money to fork up in the first place, but now, things are different. Things change, you fucking adjust and adapt. I just want OUT, so i can move on with my freakin' life!

I literally, financially and emotionally, cannot tolerate paying for and living in that house anymore.

I just got news that he got approved for a loan to buy me out. He just has to come up with money for the appraisal, which he'll get back at the closing. Woohoo! I'm that much closer to being O to the U to the T! =)

Thanks for the vent.

More soon...

Some Wishes

2006-03-31T00:40:00.000-06:00

Tonight, I went out for sushi with my best girl, Ann. We had such a great time at dinner, talking life, savoring the flavors of sushi... then hanging out in front of Baskin Robbins with our Mocha Blast and Cappuccino Blast, just like the old days... talking more life, cracking up about our past and present, creating new memories (i.e., me having to pee sooo bad, that I couldn't concentrate on driving anymore), building on our sisterhood... Seeing her once a week lately has been wonderful.

I love spending time with the people I love. They bring new meaning and new perspectives into my life and I welcome them all with open arms.

Tonite, I have developed some wishes in life...
— I wish that people with children would be more careful with them... (i.e., not have them cross a busy parking lot unattended!?)
— I wish that people with children set a responsible example for them... to be able to mold them into responsible, mature adults as well.
— I wish that my future children be exposed to as much positive energy as possible.
— I wish I could control the evils that surround us daily and keep them to a minimum when it comes to approaching my future children. But then again, those evils will hopefully create stronger and wiser individuals.
— I wish that parents of young ones right now were as strict as my parents were to me when I was growing up. I hated it when I was younger, but am now thankful that they were strict because it plays a large part in who I am today.
— I wish I knew what lies ahead of me, but I'm grateful that I don't have those answers. It will keep me on my toes and will keep my life interesting.
— I wish that everyone would try sushi just once in their life.
— I wish I would get back into my old workout routine to get back into shape.
— I wish that people can learn to love themselves before entering any relationship.
— I wish that EVERYONE could feel the kind of love and happiness that I am surrounded by DAILY.

The Awakening

2003-10-31T22:26:00.000-06:00

The Awakening . . .

Really long but definitely worth the read. I wish I could take the credit for writing this (and the author still remains anonymous), but I didn't write it. I received it in an e-mail back in October 31, 2003. I just wanted to share it with you 'cuz I thought it was definitely worth sharing. Everyone can at least relate to one or two or all of these:

A time comes in your life when you finally get it...

When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your
tracks, and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on.

And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin
to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears, and through a
mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to
change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next
horizon.

You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you
are not Cinderella and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale
endings (or beginnings for that matter), and that any guarantee of "happily ever
after" must begin with you; and in the process a sense of serenity is born of
acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone
will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are and that's OK. (They are
entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance
of loving and championing yourself; and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of
self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to
you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is
the unexpected.
You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they
say, and that not everyone will always be there for you; and that it's not always
about you. So, you learn to stand on your own, and to take care of yourself; and in the
process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as
they are, and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties; and in the process a
sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around
you, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into
your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you
should behave, how you should look, and how much you should weigh; what you should wear and
where you should shop, and what you should drive; how and where you
should live, and what you should do for a living; who you should sleep with, who you should marry,
and what you should expect of a marriage; the importance of having and raising
children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you
begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to
discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into
to begin with; and in the process you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive.

And that there is power and glory in creating and contributing; and you
stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next
fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the
outdated ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which
you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the
world and that you can't teach a pig to sing.

You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and the
importance of setting boundaries, and learning to say NO.

You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry,
and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love,
how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away.

You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a
relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important
because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your
name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as
you would have them be.

You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn
that just as people grow and change, so it is with love...and you learn that you don't have the
right to demand love on your terms just to make you happy.

And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely.

And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will
never be a perfect size, and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and
agonizing over how you
"stack up."

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing
things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is
your right to want things and to ask for the things that you want...and that sometimes it is
necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love,
kindness, sensitivity and respect;and you won't settle for less. And, you allow only the hands of
a lover who cherishes you to glorify you with his or her touch and in
the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.

And you learn that your body really is your temple, and you begin to
care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and
taking more time to exercise.

You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and
fear. So you take more time to rest.

And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take
more time to laugh and to play.

You learn, that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you
deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that
wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need
direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that
it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber
baron of all time.

FEAR itself.

You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know
that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to
give away the right to live life on your terms.

And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under
a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you
think you deserve; and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these
occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't
punishing you or failing to answer your prayers.

It's just life happening.

And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state, the ego. You
learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and
redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you, and poison the
universe that surrounds you.

You learn to admit when you are wrong and to building bridges instead of
walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for
granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream
about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a
long hot shower.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself; and
you to make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever, settle for less
than your heart's desire.

And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the
wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to
stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a
stand; you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want
to live as best as you can.